


I Always Want to Kiss You Katara...

by worldcrawler



Category: Avatar (TV), Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: Alcohol, Awkward, Ember Island, F/M, Teenagers, Zutara
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-05-24
Updated: 2017-07-31
Packaged: 2018-11-04 14:14:48
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 19,540
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10992603
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/worldcrawler/pseuds/worldcrawler
Summary: During their stay on Ember Island preparing for Sozin's Comet, some things are brought into sharp focus... namely the feelings between Zuko and Katara... through all the possible teenagery tropes out there because I want a little silliness once in a while! Expect overheard conversations, drunken nights on the beach, drinking games, fluff and a good dose of smut later on. Don't know how long this will be, it just literally needed to get out of my head! I'm guessing something like 4 or 5 chapters...Also...let us just assume Katara is like 15/16 or whatever the age of consent is wherever you're reading this! It would make Sokka a year older at 17, Suki and Zuko also at 17. Aang and Toph can remain at 13.





	1. Overhearing Girl Talk

**Author's Note:**

> Here you go, silliness part 1, featuring overheard conversations. I'm sure I've read a fic with a similar set up that probably inspired this particular chapter but I can't find it anymore to credit it!! Anyway enjoy and as always drop me a comment if you like it :) 
> 
> p.s. I am coming back to Blood, Chi, and Full Moons, don't worry! I'm finally getting around to having time to finish it! And I also have another fic in the works of which I'll probably post the first chapter soon...

“….and then we went to the prison to free all the earth benders because Katara had a massive crush on Haru - you remember him, from the Air Temple?” Sokka was saying, recounting in a rather exaggerated manner their early adventures for Zuko and Suki and Toph.

“I did _not_ have a crush on him!” protested Katara, going red in the face.

“You so did! Anyway, stop interrupting! Where was I? Oh yeah….” Continued Sokka, unfazed by his sister’s embarrassment. 

“Toph, Katara, I think we need to have a chat in the living room,” said Suki a while later, smoothly plucking the two girls from the room and shifting them to a more secluded spot.

Aang and Sokka were arguing about something to do with boomerangs and how to combine airbending with the weapon so as to reach high berries found in the fire nation. After a few minutes Zuko decided the girls were probably more entertaining and got up to join them.

“I can tell you’re lying Sugar Queen,” he heard Toph say as he approached the living room, “you sooooo had a thing with Haru!” Zuko didn’t want to think why his heart stuttered a little bit at that.

“Fine! I fancied him just a little bit ok? Is that what you want to hear? But nothing happened!” Katara was getting defensive. 

Zuko realised Toph must know he was hovering and so pushed his way into the room, trying to hide the irritation at that last comment.

“I didn’t know you were into moustaches and beards Katara,” he teased. Toph sniggered.

“He didn’t have a beard when I first met him!” cried Katara, blushing furiously.

“Zuko, no offence but this is a girl talk, you should go back to your manly men,” said Suki forcefully. Zuko snorted.

“Beat it Sparky, we’re trying to figure out Katara’s type! Important stuff!” Zuko sighed, but his gaze lingered on Katara’s blushing cheeks before he retreated back to the boys.   


 

* * *

“What are they talking about in there?” asked Sokka when Zuko joined them. Ah they obviously had noticed his absence.

“Something about trying to figure out Katara’s type,” he shrugged, dropping back down on the steps.

“Type of what?” asked Aang, suddenly interested. Zuko raised his good eyebrow.

“Type of man,” he said, emphasising the word ‘man’ so that the kid would get the hint and stay away from her. Aang looked shifty.

“I…uh…I forgot something in the other room… I’ll be right back…” he mumbled as he sped away. Zuko rolled his eyes.

“Suki will not be happy,” Zuko muttered.

“Suki…” said Sokka dreamily. “Oh wait! Suki will kill him if she catches him eavesdropping!!” snapped Sokka, jumping to his feet. “You coming to retrieve Aang?” he asked Zuko.

“Oh I am _not_ getting involved,” replied Zuko. But when Sokka was out of sight he jumped up and went to the floor above, grimacing at his own childish curiosity. He and Azula used to look through a hole from the floor above to watch what happened in the living room. He pushed those memories away, but made his way down the deserted upper corridor and lay down on the floor, putting his eye to the little spyhole carefully not making any noise. He knew that Toph couldn’t sense him up here on the wood, and would probably not be listening out for him either, so as long as he stayed quiet he should be alright.   


 

* * *

Zuko could see Aang crouched in a corner just behind the couch and Sokka on the floor on the corner of the door, just out of sight of the girls, trying to get Aang to leave. He also noticed Toph’s lips twitch as she sensed them there, but they were deep in conversation. Toph did not look happy.

“…so he was just really sweet to me and… I don’t know kind of rugged and rough around the edges but I thought he was fighting for the greater good…” Katara was saying, fidgeting with her shirt. 

“Ok so, you liked the rough look in Jet,” summarised Suki, “and the good heart,” she quickly added at Katara’s scowl. “Hey, that’s nothing to be ashamed of! I’m totally into that too! That’s why I like your brother - he’s so brave and his heart is in the right place and he is fiercely loyal…” Zuko saw Sokka’s expression soften and he stopped trying to get to Aang, instead listening intently. Zuko, instead, had a burning dislike of Jet which he had recently buried but which flared up even stronger. He breathed out and calmed himself down.

“What’s it like, Suki? When you and Sokka kiss?” asked Katara, hugging her knees. Toph scoffed.

“Why on earth would you ask that Sugar Queen?!” she asked, “It’s not like we need more reminders of what they’re up to!” Suki threw a pillow at her.

“No… I mean… what do you feel when you kiss? I want to know what its meant to be like?” persisted Katara, big blue eyes honestly interested.

“Well.. there are lots of different types of kisses… at the beginning I was all fluttery in my stomach and it was like time stopped when we kissed and it felt so right! Like we were made to be doing that! But now there are other kisses too.. when one of us is feeling down there are kisses that remind you there are good things too, and when I’m tired he’ll kiss me to give me a little bit of strength… and then there are the passionate kisses which you know… are sort of a promise of other things and they sort of consume you like fire so you don’t know where you are anymore…” Zuko frowned. Was Sokka brushing a tear from his eye? What was this! 

But inside Zuko thought that he’d had maybe some of the preamble kisses from Mai, but no comforting ones, none there to give him energy… they were mostly expectant kisses, leading up to something else…in fact he was pretty sure Mai had some sort of internal timer for how long they should be kissing before moving on to other things..  and time definitely didn’t stop! What a silly idea!

“With Jet I was just really nervous. And he was a little… um… forceful? It was alright but nothing like losing track of time,” frowned Katara. 

“Maybe he just wasn’t a very good kisser,” offered Toph, “although from what you said it sounds like he had enough experience.” Katara groaned and covered her blushing face with her hands. Zuko's eyes narrowed. He didn't like the sound of whatever else Jet had experience in. Sokka was probably thinking the same thing as his hand went to the boomerang tied to his side. 

“No I think, you know, I know Sokka, so its special. Its nothing to do with technique or whatever - I had to teach him that -” Suki started, Toph interrupting her with a howl of laughter. Zuko could see Sokka’s face going red up to the tips of his ears. “BUT,” Suki continued, ignoring Toph as much as she could, “it means that I see him watching me and I can already taste what the kiss will be like and I just find myself pressed against him before I know what I’m doing. Its sort of magical. I don’t think you can have that with somebody you don’t really know.”

“Yeah, you’re probably right,” answered Katara. Zuko thought of Mai again. How he couldn’t tell what was going on with her at all - she could look at him with the same gaze she stared down anybody and then she would be leaning in for a kiss. He pushed it to the back of is mind. He noticed Toph shifting uncomfortably where she was sitting.

“What about when you and Aang kissed?” she asked.

“Oh well.. he kissed me really! And I think it was just from the relief you know, that we were still alive after the invasion. It was a little weird to be honest… he’s like a little brother to me, and he’s so young!” said Katara thoughtfully, flipping her plait to her back. 

Unknown to her, Aang scooted out, tears in his eyes. Sokka followed a split second later, looking torn as to whether to stay or go after his friend. Zuko sighed. Oh Toph, he thought. But the little guy needed to hear it at some point, and this way Katara wouldn’t have to break it to him - because Zuko seriously doubted whether she had it in her to break his heart to his face. Toph had clearly thought this through. 

And strangely, Zuko felt a massive weight lifted from his shoulders, although he wasn’t sure why exactly. It was obvious she didn’t feel the same way towards Aang as he felt to her, but there was still some doubt in Zuko’s mind. And that was getting in the way of training. Yeah. That was it. Can’t train a delusional, love sick puppy in firebendng! Maybe now Aang will have some power behind his punches. Yeah… that’s why he was relieved… no other explanation for it! 

Below him they were talking again. Zuko listened in.

“Oh God, Sugar Queen! Spit it out!” Toph was saying.

“Okok, I just wanted to ask if you … you know… touch yourself… like at night…” Zuko blushed so hard he felt the tip of his good ear go red.

“Oh nah I don’t. They talked about it a lot at the Earth Rumble but don’t really feel like it…” Toph replied, completely unfazed. Zuko wondered exactly how much Toph knew about everything, because she seemed pretty well informed for somebody so young!

“Oh sweetie, Toph,  you’re a little young! One day you’ll try it and it will be good! But just do it when its natural for you alright? Katara, for your age its completely normal. Amongst our warriors we actually have scrolls teaching us the best ways to bring pleasure because we train in independence. Sometimes men use that kind of pleasure to control our loyalties. So we need to make sure our girls know they can do everything themselves!” Suki said, proudly.

“Really,” gasped Katara, “That’s a pretty cool thing to do! I just sort of… fumble around… I don’t really know what I’m doing most of the time…” admitted Katara. 

Suki clapped her hands. “Well girls, listen in and I’ll give you some tips!” she sounded excited to be sharing her information, and both Toph and Katara leaned forward. 

Zuko decided this was probably way past the time for him to leave, so he quietly picked himself up and lightly tiptoed to the wing of the house with the bedrooms, careful not to make a sound. 

He scowled as he shut his door behind him. He couldn’t deny that a certain waterbender doing those things wasn’t a tad arousing, but he needed to calm down and keep it under control. He knew that as soon as he admitted being attracted to her to himself he would have to admit to how long that attraction had been happening… and whether it was indeed just attraction….He breathed out smoke and walked out onto the balcony. There he could see Sokka running around trying to talk to Aang, but the little airbender was kicking up a real storm of sand, trying to keep Sokka away. Eventually, he snapped open his glider and flew off. Zuko ground his teeth. Now was not the time to be running away. He better be back by morning firebending practice or so help him.

Zuko ran a hand through his hair before flipping off the balcony and striding out to meet Sokka.

“Hey Sokka,” he greeted. Sokka jumped, still looking at the patch of dark sky Aang had disappeared into.

“Oh hey Zuko!” he said, all too casually.

“Why has Aang flown away?” asked Zuko, seriously.

“Oh well… you see…” Sokka started, clearly looking for an excuse, but stopped at Zuko’s no-nonsense expression, “See its like this… we were eavesdropping on the girls’ conversation and Katara kind of admitted she wasn’t into Aang - and you know how Aang follows her around all the time! He didn’t take it too well…” 

“You think he had no idea?” asked Zuko, genuinely interested.

“Thats what I said! I mean its not like she’s falling into his arms or anything! To be honest its been getting on my nerves a little bit…” trailed off Sokka looking a little guilty.

“Yeah,” agreed Zuko, “she mothers him too much. And how could she be sexually attracted to a twelve year old! That would  be strange.” 

Sokka’s eyes went wide. “My sister isn’t sexually attracted to anybody!” he cried, jamming a finger into Zuko’s chest for emphasis, “but… yeah… especially not a little brother like Aang. She treats Aang like she used to treat me… expect better cause, you know, he’s the Avatar and needs to defeat the Fire Lord blah di blah di blah. Honestly Zuko, you’re the only one Katara doesn’t mother!” Sokka sighed, looking into the sky again. Something fluttered in Zuko's chest

“He better come back,” growled Zuko. 

“Yeah he will, Aang just needs some time to himself, that’s all,” said Sokka but not exactly convinced himself. 

“I’m going to bed,” announced Zuko, turning on his heel. He didn’t exactly want to have a heart to heart with the Avatar over the heartbreaking realisation that the girl who mothers him doesn’t share his little crush.

“I’ll stay here and wait a little longer,” said Sokka. Zuko nodded and headed off. He supposed that if Sokka didn't get Aang under control they would need to admit to the girls they were eavesdropping. And that little tidbit of information was sure to cause a stir.  


 

* * *

As he passed the living room, he couldn’t help himself hearing what was going on… although he didn’t pause his step for fear of Toph’s wrath.

“Come on Sweetness, who is it you think about when you have Sugar Time?” came Toph’s mocking voice. Zuko frowned. Sugar Time! Argh!

“Oh nobody…” said Katara. He could almost hear the blush in her voice.

“Ooooh is it somebody we know?” asked Suki with an excitement only rivalled by Ty Lee.

“No, nobody you know,” said Katara. Zuko was almost out of hearing.

“Liar!” cried Toph. 

Zuko went to his room, trying not to think that through. It was going to be a very hot and stuffy night. 

 

* * *

Zuko couldn’t sleep. He would not be giving in to all the images overhearing that little talk had given him, but neither could they damned well leave him alone! Eventually he got up to make himself some chamomile tea.

When he arrived at the kitchen though there was light spilling out. He turned in and saw Katara sitting at the table, a teapot and cup in front of her. His heart leapt to his throat. She looked up and her eyes widened slightly in shock, before quickly looking away.

“I… I couldn’t sleep,” he said in explanation. “Can I come in? I wanted some chamomile.” 

“I actually just made some I was waiting to brew, if you want,” she replied, gesturing to the one on the table. Zuko nodded and crossed to pick another teacup from the cupboard and sat down at the table with her. They were silent for a while, waiting for the brew to finish, and then Katara gently poured them both a cup. Zuko still said nothing Something was obviously worrying her and she would talk when she was ready.

"Can I ask you something Zuko?" she said finally, fixing him with timid but inquisitive eyes. Zuko nodded. "You've... you've had sex right?" 

Zuko's good eyebrow rose. He was not expecting that - but in retrospect it would be obvious that was on her mind. Spirits it was on his mind enough!

"When you... kissed... was it... was it you know... magical?" she asked, blushing, and he understood that she meant more than just kissing. He thought back to Suki's answer earlier and he sighed.

"No, not really. It was nice. Fun. A little awkward." Zuko wondered how on earth he had now been drawn into girl talk! Katara hummed pensively.

"See, that's it was like with Jet! Oh I mean the kissing. Not the sex. We didn't... you know... anyway, Suki said that with Sokka its sort of like magic and time stops," she blabbered, clearly a little uncomfortable with the discussion. Zuko decided two things: he hated Jet and he had no pity for her. He would not be helping her out of her awkwardness. She had started it.

Alright maybe he had a little pity.

"I think," he said kindly, "that Sokka and Suki have something really special." 

Katara suddenly made eye contact with him, large blue locking with his eyes for a few heartbeats, before lowering to observe her tea.

"Yeah, I guess so." She took a sip. "Have I ever told you how Sokka and Suki met?" she asked, suddenly more upbeat. Zuko shook his head, taking a sip of the chamomile.

Katara launched into a tale of Sokka's disregard for the female warriors and how he had been forced to wear a dress to make up for his lack of skills and had trouble with the makeup - how Suki had kicked his arse on multiple occasions only to turn around and offer to train him in Kyoshi ways. Zuko thought he could listen to the sound of her voice all night. He found himself laughing along with her descriptions and found how she used more swear words and crude descriptions when she spoke to him as opposed to when she spoke to Aang. Not quite Toph standard, but somewhere more like Suki in her directness.

“Its just so strange you know? That at the beginning of it all he was a useless fighter while she was already trained but he never gave up against her anyway. And they had completely different takes on the war and he managed to change her mind to get involved. I mean they pretty much hated one another at first! She even tied us all to a pole the first time we met! Sokka was not happy about that at all!” she giggled. The laughter died on her lips when she realised Zuko was no longer laughing with her. 

Zuko’s heart was beating faster than normal. Sokka and Suki’s story… it seemed like a miniature version of his and Katara’s. He had a strange feeling in the pit of his stomach. Was it hope? Why would he hope? He tried to shake it away, but realised his hesitation had made her stop laughing and was regarding him with an odd look. He studied his tea for a while. 

“Its good… that they found each other… in the midst of war,” he said eventually. There was another silence as he thought about when he’d tied Katara to the tree. He knew she was thinking about the same thing by the way she played with her necklace.

“You know, I didn’t know… about your necklace… I’m sorry,” he murmured. She looked up, surprised he’d read her thoughts so easily.

“I know Zuko, its alright. I never thought I’d see it again when I lost it anyway,” she replied in a low, sincere voice.

“Just, if I’d known I wouldn’t have used it. That was not… honourable,” he insisted, running a hand through his hair. 

Katara snorted. “A lot more honourable that what I thought was going to happen,” she said offhandedly, pouring herself another cup of tea. “Being bribed with my mother’s necklace was really quite a relief!” 

Zuko frowned at her. The he replayed the scene in his head and realised what it would have seemed like. His whole face went red.

“Katara I didn’t… I didn’t think that… I would never… I couldn’t do something like that… that’s… what… no… “ he spluttered. She waved a hand to cut him off. “I’m sorry I scared you like that,” he said after a deep breath.

“Honestly, its alright Zuko. I’ve forgiven you for it already. I’m not stupid, I know how those things work and I was scared… but you didn’t even try anything and I think, at least for me, that’s when I started trusting you. Because I knew that for all you were awful and doing the wrong thing, you didn’t actually want to hurt us. You weren’t like the pirates or Zhao or the others who took pleasure in the pain of other people.”

Zuko let out a humourless laugh. “I tie you to a tree, try to bribe you with your mother’s necklace and you started trusting me? Because I didn’t try to rape you? Ha! That’s a pretty low standard right there!” 

Katara shrugged. “There’s a war. I was alone. I hadn’t even mastered bending yet,” she pointed out.

“It doesn’t matter what I’d done, you wouldn’t have told me where they were, wouldn’t you?” he asked quietly, spreading his fingers out on the table, trying to relax them from the fists he had been clenching. “You were ready for anything.”

Katara made eye contact then, intense blue immersing his vision.

“I protect my friends,” she said simply. She reached out and grabbed his hands from the table, holding them in her own. For some reason the contact made Zuko jump and he noticed the same little reaction from her before she frowned and spoke. “Please don’t beat yourself up about this Zuko and go all moody! We can’t be focusing on that right now.” 

Zuko opened his mouth to retort that he wasn’t moody, but he saw the sincerity in her eyes and he just nodded. She gave his hands a light squeeze and let go. Zuko missed them.

“Well this has gotten far too serious,” she said after a while of contemplative silence. “Would you rather… eat sea prunes or the hottest fireflake ever?” 

Zuko’s lip curled up in a half smile “Hottest fireflake. No question,” he replied quickly. Katara play hit his arm.

“Sea prunes aren’t that bad!” she replied, smiling. 

“You know, this is a drinking game?” he said after a few more rounds. 

“Is it? How?” 

“Well every time you get asked something you have to drink before answering. The idea is you’ll be more truthful or something,” he replied. He remembered some of the kids they’d met at that infernal party doing something similar. His crew occasionally used to play. Zuko never participated. However, playing with one smiling water bender might be quite… fun.

“Huh. We’ll have to play some time,” she said, smiling.

 

* * *

Aang returned late that night, after Zuko and Katara had finally gone to sleep. Sokka was dozing against a rock on the beach when he head the sound of Aang’s glider snap shut. He was on his feet in a moment.

“Aang, how’s it going buddy?” he asked quickly, patting him on the back.

“I’m ok Sokka! I’ve decided that maybe if I tell her how I feel she might see it makes sense for us to end up together! Good night!” called a jovial Aang, already heading to his room on an air scooter. 

Sokka’s jaw dropped. Oh boy was that kid in for a nasty surprise. Sokka tried to brush as much sand off as he could and went to sleep too.


	2. FireWhisky And Rum

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which the Gaang watch the Boy in the Iceberg and decide to drown their sorrow... except some things didn't go to plan out on the balcony and Katara may have exaggerated on the rum and Zuko may have been left to hear her rant on the beach...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And the wonderful teenagery tropes continue - this one: being upset and drowning oneself in alcohol! Argh why is everybody being so mean to Aang? I'll make them see the errors of their ways, little cinnamon roll needs some love and understanding!

 

The next day Aang kept trying to get out of his fire bending and earth bending lessons to talk to Katara. His Sifus were having none of it. Toph clearly understood that the message hadn't got through to her friend and was working him hard. Zuko also realised that instead of being sad or angry, Aang looked hopeful. And with that he probably wanted to try rekindle something. And Zuko decided that was definitely not happening! He was probably being too hard on Aang. But he didn't want Aang to go anywhere near Katara today.

Sokka and Suki came back from town excited that there was a new play happening about them and they all decided to go, momentarily distracted from what they all knew was happening behind the scenes. From the way Suki was acting cold towards Sokka, Zuko assumed she had been informed of last night's sneaking around.

Zuko made a mental note of who knew what: Toph, Suki, Sokka and Aang knew that Sokka and Aang had overheard the girls' conversation. Sokka knew Suki Knew. Toph knew both Sokka and Suki knew. Aang didn't know anybody but Sokka knew. Zuko knew everything but nobody knew about Zuko. Katara knew nothing but was on edge at the uneasy atmosphere, sensing something was odd.

When they sat down in the theatre Zuko decidedly sat between Aang and Katara as a buffer. Katara smiled at him as he sat. Aang did not, but since he didn't know that Zuko knew anything was happening, he couldn't say anything.

After the intermission Katara and Aang retook their places but Katara's face was ashen and Aang was only there in body. Zuko wondered what he had missed. Even Toph's pure delight at the play couldn't cut the tension between Aang and Katara. Zuko felt suffocated being in the middle of it.

Then there was a scene under Ba Sing Se. The actors played it like they were lovers. Zuko needed to remind himself to relax his jaw occasionally. Aang didn't even seem to notice.

As if that wasn't bad enough, the ending of the play where everybody died put a huge downer on all of them - apart from Toph, who seemed to be completely alright with it. Zuko thought it was forced.

As they started to walk back, Zuko stopped them in the middle square, telling them he'd be right back. He ran into the first bar he saw and ordered a few bottles; some brandy, some firewhisky, some sort of vodka mix, and some rum. He walked out holding three bottles by the neck and already drinking out of the fire whisky. He didn't want to face his own death. He didn't want to face any of the things in that damned play. And he just wanted to drink himself to oblivion. He thought that maybe it wouldn't be such an unpopular idea.

As he approached the group, Sokka eyed the bottles and took the vodka off of him. Suki chose the brandy and to his surprise, Katara took the rum. She took a swig and made the most adorable face as she swallowed, but then closed her eyes and took a deep breath.

"What? What's going on?" asked Toph, confused at the silent exchanges.

"Zuko got us some alcohol, Toph," explained Suki kindly.

"Sweet! Is there any nectar beer?" she asked.

"Aren't you a little young to be drinking Toph?" asked Katara, looking at her friend.

"Yeah like I never had a beer at the Earth Rumbles! They thought they could get a little girl drunk and beat me in the ring - never worked. But I don't like all that spirit stuff! Bleh!" Katara smiled. "Well? Go on then! Where's my nectar beer?"

"I'm not sure I feel completely comfortable giving you alcohol Toph," said Katara.

"You shouldn't be having any either," interrupted Sokka, looking at his baby sister. She wasn't so much of a baby anymore. She looked old and tired and not a little put out.

"Leave her be Snoozles, she's old enough to do everything else, she's old enough to drink. Anyway I've just listened to myself and all my friends die a pretty brutal death and if you guys can all drink away your sorrows, I want in," she insisted. Zuko sighed and handed his bottle to Katara while he dove back into the bar, emerging a few minutes later with a small bottle of beer. Toph looked content and sipped it gingerly.

"You want some Twinkletoes?" she asked, extending the bottle. Aang wrinkled his nose.

"The monks taught us not to drink as it would interfere with our clarity!" he said. It was clear he had been trying to not interfere but now it all came out. "You guys shouldn't be drinking either!" he chided.

Sokka sighed.

"Just for once Aang, let us be teenagers without the air nomad wisdom lectures," he said, looking tired himself. Aang looked at Katara, since this is where she would usually pipe up in Aang's defence. She returned his gaze and took another swig from the bottle, this time showing nothing on her face. Zuko couldn't help wonder what exactly had gone on in the intermission. On the one hand he was happy she wasn't mothering Aang, but on the other this was harsh on the kid. He'd also seen himself get defeated. If anything he had to feel like it was all on his shoulders. He must have said something to make Katara really mad to make her act like this.

Zuko was going to ask. But then he took another drink and decided he didn't want to deal with it tonight.

Toph had put her arms around Aang's shoulders though.

"Come on Twinkletoes, we little ones gotta stick together while the oldies over there drink the hard stuff. Sometimes thats just what oldies do," she was saying as she lead the way out of the village and across the beach.

Sokka and Suki were walking leaning close to one another talking quietly, occasionally kissing.

Zuko and Katara brought up the rear, each drinking from their bottles.

"You want to be careful with that, its strong," he found himself saying, indicating the rum.

"I know," she replied. Zuko took a closer look and realised she had hardly drunk any of it, which he was thankful for. She must have only been taking small sips. He didn't want to have any casualties on his hands.

"You want to talk about what happened between you and Aang?" he ventured, alcohol mixing with curiosity and not a little concern.

"I told him no and he kissed me," she replied in a deadpan voice.

"No to what?"

"I'm not quite sure. Whether I loved him, wanted to be his girlfriend, get married, have babies… not quite sure he separated them out in his mind," she said before taking a bigger swig of the bottle.

"He shouldn't have kissed you if you said no," he offering lamely, unsure of what else to say.

"I KNOW," she exploded.

Finally, thought Zuko. There was the anger he was looking for! Better she explode now out of the hearing of the others than let it build all night. Besides, he could take an angry Katara. He didn't like it, but this time it wasn't directed at him.

"I TOLD him I didn't feel like that and then he goes on about how I'm his forever girl or some shit like that and that I'd come around to that idea - and when I told him that I really didn't think so, he goes and kisses me!" Katara was seething. Zuko noticed how the sea to their side swelled threateningly. It looked like she wanted to hurl the bottle away in anger but she drank instead.

The house appeared in the distance. Toph and Aang must have already been inside since there was light coming out of the windows. Katara stopped. She drank some more, plonked herself down on the sand, and promptly started crying. Zuko was unsure of what to do so he gently took the bottle away from her. Up ahead Sokka and Suki were rushing back to them.

"Aang confronted Katara," Zuko said to them quietly, handing Sokka her bottle of rum - what was left of it. Zuko looked at them with pleading eyes and Sokka nervously approached Katara. Suki put a hand on his shoulder to stop him.

"I don't think she would want to talk to you Sokka. I think we should go talk to Aang. Zuko, just let her know we're all here for her alright? She talks to you more sincerely than she talks to us," said Suki gently. Sokka didn't look convinced but sighed.

"Look after her Zuko. Don't leave her on her own," he said, giving Zuko a small punch on his arm as Suki lead him away. He didn't know whether to be happy they had decided he was to take care of Katara or scared - whether they actually believed she would open up to him or they thought she might start bending. He took another drink of firewhisky.

Gingerly, Zuko approached Katara and sat down next to her, realising she had stopped sobbing.

"It's my fault you know," she said quietly. "I'm the reason he can't reach the Avatar state. He can't let go of earthly attachments… he can't let go of me… so his chakra is blocked."

Zuko took a deep breath. He didn't realise how deeply Aang felt for her. Or at least, how deeply he thought he felt for her. There was no doubt in Zuko's mind that the kind of adoration Aang was feeling wasn't the same as the kind of romantic love Aang thought he was feeling. Aang had never had a mother, being brought up by the monks, and then after waking up the only comfort in his life was Katara. He needed her. He loved her. But he wasn't in love with her.

"You know, that really isn't your fault," Zuko said gently. Katara shook her head.

"Maybe I shouldn't have been so kind to him all the time, defended him all the time. I don't know. I never gave him any reason to think I was in love with him… but I'm the reason we might all die when the comet arrives," she said sadly.

"Aang will figure it out," he said, uncertain of what else to offer. "You're like a mother to him. He will figure out that he needs to grow up now." And he better do it quickly, he thought to himself.

There was a silence as she shuffled her feet into the sand.

"I got really angry at him," she admitted. "I just couldn't face the image of it. If we defeat the Fire Lord I mean. Following him around for ever and ever, watching him rebuild the temples. What would I be? A vehicle to give birth to a new generation of Air Nomads. I want to do something more with my life."

Zuko gulped. He could see it all happening too. He didn't like it either, but squashed the flame of anger that lit up inside him - Aang was a very young, very lost boy. He didn't understand what Katara felt.

"What do you want?" asked Zuko softly.

"I don't know. I want to make a difference to my Tribe. I want to make a home. I want to be respected. I don't want people to look through me anymore because of who I'm with or the fact I'm a girl." She pushed the heels of her hands into her eyes.

"Nobody should be allowed to eclipse you," he said into the night. "But you've never allowed yourself to be eclipsed Katara, not really."

Katara turned to him then, fixing him as much as she could in her wobbly state. She turned out to sea once more, leaving them both cloaked in silence for a few minutes.

"Do you think I'm pretty Zuko? Would I stand a chance with somebody who isn't Aang?" she asked, turning back to him.

Despite himself Zuko laughed incredulously.

"I don't think that will be a problem Katara," he said. "When you decide what you want to do, you will turn around and find as many men as you like for you to choose from."

"Is that a yes?"

"Katara, you're beautiful," he said quietly, reaching out and brushing a strand of hair from her face. He could see her blush even in the darkness. He should have been blushing to the tips of his ears but perhaps he'd had too much to drink. He really didn't care. She was processing this new information.

"So if I'm pretty, do you think that's why Aang just tried to kiss me?" she asked finally.

"I… I don't know. Maybe. I think Aang likes your kindness and the way you look after him more." Zuko actually had no idea, but that fit in with what he thought was going on. He took another drink.

"Have you ever wanted to kiss me Zuko?" Zuko froze. She was looking at him so sincerely, but she wasn't even sitting up properly anymore. Oh! She was actually falling backwards! He reached out and caught her.

"Katara you're quite drunk, you can't even sit up straight!" he said instead.

"Well then help me to," she mumbled, crawling between his legs and sitting so that his arm around her shoulders and his leg were her back support. He legs were bent over his other leg which was straight. She nuzzled into his chest. Zuko was glad she was on his right side so she couldn't hear his heart beat pick up.

"So?" She asked.

"So what?"

"Have you ever wanted to kiss me?"

"I always want to kiss you Katara." The words were out of his mouth before he could stop them. He didn't really miss them much. They might help her build her confidence up right now and he very much doubted she would remember it in the morning anyway.

Her face crumpled in confusion.

"Like when?"

Zuko sighed and ran his left hand through his hair. He took another drink, realising that most of the bottle was gone.

"Like when I tied you to the tree and you were so brave and stubborn but you wouldn't understand what I was trying to tell you - I wanted to get you to understand me," he said as she giggled.

"When you tried to heal Uncle and I pushed you away all I wanted to do was kiss you and beg you to help me.

And then at the North Pole when you beat me because you had become so strong and I was so shocked.

And again when I beat you. I made sure you were alive but I wanted to kiss you better - somebody so strong shouldn't be reduced like that.

Again under Ba Sing Se when you touched my scar because you were so kind and gentle and warm - and it scared me how much I wanted to kiss you then.

And at the Air Temple when you wouldn't talk to me because I had betrayed you I wanted to kiss it better, to go back to that moment of peace we had.

And then when the temple came crashing down and I thought you were going to die but I got to you in time and I was so happy you weren't hurt I wanted to kiss you with relief.

And when you caught me as I fell to bring me back to Appa I wanted to kiss you thank you.

When you confronted Yon Rah and you were so determined I thought you might crack… and after you spared him I wanted to kiss you to tell you that you'd done the right thing if it felt right to you.

And when you forgave me I wanted to kiss you in joy.

And last night in the kitchen when you held my hands… I wanted to kiss you then too…" They were silent for a while. Zuko traced circles into her shoulder where his hand was and took in the scent of her hair. She had never been this close before. He didn't want her to be any further away again.

"What about right now? Do you want to kiss me right now?" She said quietly, playing with the front of his shirt.

"I always want to kiss you Katara," he murmured into her hair.

"But you're not going to?"

"You're drunk. I wouldn't kiss you unless I knew you wanted me to."

Katara pushed away from his chest and locked him in her gaze. "What if I wanted you to kiss me right now?"

"You're drunk Katara," is all he said, but it didn't do nearly enough to express the squeezing in his chest, his need to cry out because it was really too cruel that they had been drinking instead of sober. How much he wanted to hear those words any other time but now… not now… when he could file them away in memory but know he would never hear them in earnest.

"What if I kiss you though? That would be ok?" she asked. Zuko's breathing caught in his throat. He just nodded. He didn't know whether he wanted her do to it or not. He didn't get the chance to decide.

Her lips pressed against his. They were soft, he registered, and plump. It was only a light kiss but she pressed into him a little before leaning away. But those lips were intoxicating and Zuko decided that they were both drunk and she wanted to kiss so … so maybe… he could just have one more…

He followed her when she pulled back and pressed his lips back against hers, pressing a little harder. But she was ready for him and she threw her arms around his neck, deepening the kiss, parting her lips against his. His tongue shot out, into her mouth, playing with hers as she twisted her body towards him. Somehow he was on his back in the sand and she was pressed on top of him, hands tangled in his loose hair. He let his hands wonder over her back, pressing her closer. Somehow her legs parted so she was straddling him. Suddenly her lips left his but she was kissing his jaw and his good ear and just under his good eye… and then across to the bad side of his face - fluttery kisses that caressed a place nobody had touched in a long time. Eventually she came back to his lips.

With just the mere thought of it he had flipped them without breaking the kisses they were giving one another so that he was on top of her, so that he could kiss her jaw and just under her ear and down her neck and along her collarbone. Every kiss was better than he had imagined. And he _had_ imagined.

But when he made his trail back to her lips he consciously started to slow things down. He could feel himself getting very excited and somewhere in the back of his mind there was a little voice saying 'this isn't real'.

When he rolled off her onto his back his world was spinning. She followed him so that she was on her side with her head on his chest. They lay comfortably for a while until he heard her take in a sharp breath.

"Zuko, everything is dizzy but the moon… its in the middle isn't it?" Zuko focussed on it.

"Yes it is."

"Have we been out here half the night?" she asked.

"Seems so…" he replied, not quite sure how the too short kiss had turned into half the night at all… "maybe it was the alcohol…" he said. But he could practically see the cogs in Katara's mind working and he hoped that they would come out in his favour. He sighed; she wouldn't remember anyway.

They picked themselves up and although Zuko had had quite a lot more than her, she could hardly stand. After a few minutes of fumbled half-walking where he tried to hold her up she suddenly lurched to the side a few steps and sunk into the sand on her hands and knees, throwing up.

Zuko wasn't too sure what to do but he thought it would be pretty bad if her hair got sick on it so he gathered it up and held it while she wretched.

"I'm so… sorry…" she was saying, just before throwing up some more.

"Its alright, just get it all up," he murmured, stroking her back. He decided to believe she was just apologising for throwing up and not the kiss.

Katara managed to wash her face in the sea before struggling back to her feet, but her balance was still off. Eventually Zuko huffed and picked her up completely. He now felt pretty sober since he had to act it to get them both home. No sooner had he picked her up that she fell asleep against his chest, one hand holding his shirt as it had done earlier that evening. Zuko tucked her up in bed, made sure there was some water next to her and reluctantly headed back to his own room. He wanted nothing more than to cuddle her - and _that_ was a strange thought indeed!


	3. Deep Meaningful Conversations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which the Gaang think about letting go and have various DMCs along the way...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: sorry! This (along with the next chapter) has been half written since I posted the last chapter but have only just got round to finishing it! We see a little more of Aang's development while behind the scenes feelings are being brought centre stage. Not much smut here - lets save that for the next chapter ;) Also do keep in mind that the characters here are slightly older than in the series - I don't think any romance would have properly blossomed without at least another year or two of maturity, especially with Katara. As always comments and criticisms welcome!
> 
> So here you go, Silliness part three - except not so silliness.. mostly growing-up awkwardness!

 

The next morning Zuko was not in a good mood for practice. He made Aang meditate for a long time partially because he needed peace and quiet for his aching head and also because Aang looked like he needed something similar. He would have to ask Sokka what had happened with Aang. But he was putting that off because he definitely didn't want to admit what had happened with Katara. Which he could still remember. All too clearly. Zuko didn't really lose much memory when he drank. Just the thought of her, rolling on top of him in the sand, made him blush.

Finally, the lesson over, Zuko ran away from the food that was on the table, and drank as much water as he could. He found Sokka.

"So?"

Sokka whistled. "Its rough. He's got it bad. He doesn't understand that its just not going to happen like he imagines it. At this point I'm not sure whether to let him live with his delusions or not…"

"No. He needs to let go of her," said Zuko, maybe a little too forcefully. "He can't let go of his earthly attachments without letting go of her and so he can't unblock his final chakra. Sokka if he can't let go, he can't use the Avatar state to defeat the Fire Lord."

"Wait for real? That's why he can't go into the avatar state? I thought it had to do with Azula's lightning!"

"Apparently not. And right now, Katara feels like its her fault. She was pretty upset last night."

"Yeah, thanks for looking after her buddy. I know she only properly vents to you. Where's Suki! Maybe she'll know what to do…channeling Kyoshi and all that.." Sokka started walking away, slightly slouched, as if he had a huge weight on his shoulders. Zuko realised he must also be feeling quite hungover, and dealing with Aang was probably not enjoyable. At least not as enjoyable as dealing with Katara had been… But Aang hadn't run away and that was a massive relief.

"He doesn't see her you know," said Zuko suddenly to Sokka's back. "He doesn't see who she really is. To him she's perfectly good." Sokka nodded.

"I know."

"To me, she's just perfect," added Zuko to himself, sighing and rubbing his brow.

* * *

Dinner was tense. Toph knew immediately things had happened she didn't know about and was listening very hard at what little people were saying. She was growing more and more frustrated at Sokka's incessant nonsense chatter.

There was a lull in the conversation.

"Alright we're talking about it. Now that everything is straightened out, I think all our training should go into meditation so Aang can practice going into the Avatar state," she said bluntly. Zuko raised his good eyebrow. So Aang had told her too. "You can't cling to Sweetness, she's not into you in that way, so now you can let go of whatever future you were dreaming up with her and unblock your last chakra right? So that should be your new focus."

Aang didn't reply and didn't look up. Katara was looking away too.

"Is it that simple?" asked Zuko. He had a feeling there would be more to this.

"I can try," said Aang in a small voice.

The rest of dinner was eaten in silence. When they finished Zuko got up to help collect the dishes as he did every evening but Katara caught his eye and shook her head.

"Don't worry about it," she said quietly, glancing towards Aang.

Zuko's stomach plummeted and he had to resist gasping for air. Did she remember the night before? Was she unhappy with him? The logical part of his mind said that if she were angry she would very probably make that known… but here Aang's feelings were involved, not to mention Sokka's reaction! He felt a now-familiar squeezing sensation in his chest.

Outwardly he merely swallowed and nodded.

Aang was their first priority.

* * *

The airbender had wondered onto the beach and sat in a meditative pose, but Zuko knew him well enough to understand there was no meditating happening. He felt himself swell with pride at Aang not flying away from the situation. The boy was trying, and that meant so much!

 _Argh, when had he got so sentimental_.

Sokka, Suki and Toph were sitting on the steps talking quietly, keeping watch over their friend.

"I think we should talk to him, he's clearly not meditating," Zuko told them. His voice came out rougher than he had intended.

"Yeah," sighed Sokka.

As a group they approached the little airbender and sat around him.

"Do you want to talk through things?" asked Zuko. When had he become the ring leader, he wondered. "What did the Guru tell you to do?"

Aang, sighed and opened his eyes, giving up his pretence. He looked small and worn.

"We talked through the chakras… and we got to the final chakra where I have to let go of earthly attachments… well I just can't do that! And… and then I spoke to your Uncle Iroh and he said I was right not to let go of love… but then the lightning and … I'm so confused!" he cried.

There was a loaded silence. Zuko was frowning.

"Love and attachment… are those the same thing?" asked Toph. "I'm just thinking, did Iroh know about the guru?"

"Ummm… no I didn't explain everything. I think they are the same thing?" answered Aang. "How could they not be?! I love Katara, I can't let go of her!"

"You can love somebody and still let go of them," said Zuko quietly. All eyes turned to him. "To have those attachments.. I think that means… that they live in your head?" Zuko groaned. "I'm not making any sense am I? Give me a second to get the words right…"

Usually this kind of crippling awkwardness would have elicited some teasing from Sokka, but they waited in silence for Zuko's brain to work through things. Thinking things through - Uncle would be proud.

"Sometimes we create people in our head… the way we want them to be… and those people motivate us to act in certain ways. Like I did that with… with my father I guess. But when I let that go it felt like this thing that had been tying me down had suddenly been cut loose. I was able to… see him I guess? See him for what he really was, even though the evidence had been there all along. And… and my mother… she uh she left us physically because she loved us. In a way I guess she let go of us but not of her love for us… What I'm trying to say is, I don't think you need to stop loving anybody, but you do need to let go of them as they are in your mind and appreciate they are their own person instead of a model you try to impress. My father couldn't give me honour. I had to give myself that. And I might be wrong but Katara gives you peace right? So maybe what the guru wants is for you to let go of her so you can give yourself peace instead?" Zuko ended on a higher note, a question. His thoughts were confused but he felt them coming together in some semblance of an explanation.

And that could legitimately be what was happening here right? Another form of his own love for his father, of attaching a part of himself to an image of somebody else. He needed to learn that he can give himself validation and find safety in himself before he could let go.

So if Aang had connected Katara in his mind with happiness, with peace, with comfort… then to let go he needed to know that he could gain those things from himself. But Aang was just a child! He should have been still playing in the dirt with the monks at this age!

Zuko sighed. Aang was young. Zuko had been younger when his mother left, and Aang's age when he had attended his first war council. Sokka and Katara had been younger when they lost their mother too. Toph had been so restricted she decided to find her own way. Suki had become the youngest leader of the Kyoshi Warriors not long after either. It seemed to be their fate to be in these situations.

"Yeah, that makes sense," said Sokka finally. "Katara can't make things alright for you - you have to do that for yourself. And you know, Aang, even if she won't to be with you in that way, she still loves you. So much! You're one of the family remember?"

Aang was looking out to sea, observing the sun as it slowly sank towards the ocean, wide, grey eyes wide with concentration.

"I just don't want to lose her. I don't want to lose any of you," he said quietly.

"You won't lose us," said Suki gently, "and you won't lose her either. We're all with you. Like Sokka said, we're a family now, and that's not going to change."

Aang was blinking back tears but a smile spread across his face.

"Thanks guys. I think maybe I've been unfair to Katara. You're right Zuko, I need to work on seeing her as her own person. I'd like to be alone for a bit now."

The others nodded and got up to leave. Toph gave him an affectionate punch, Suki and Sokka a hug and Zuko an awkward pat on the back. He couldn't help feeling intense guilt at Aang's struggle while the night before he had been passionately kissing Katara and rolling around in the sand.

Zuko rubbed his brow in frustration. He noticed the kitchen was empty, and that cold feeling in the pit of his stomach returned full force. He made himself take deep breaths and go to his room.

* * *

Zuko was exhausted but he couldn't sleep. Thoughts about Aang danced around his head, melding with his own experiences. Thoughts about Katara were all too prominant too - of the night before, of stolen glances during the day, of what everything meant - and maybe nothing at all! She was probably embarrassed for getting a little drunk and probably hungover too. But he couldn't help a part of himself hoping she could remember… nor could he help a part of himself hoping she didn't.

He gave up trying to sleep and padded down to the empty kitchen in just his loose trousers. He had considered bending to get rid of some frustration, but he didn't source his energy from that part of himself anymore. Maybe he could try Uncle's method; chamomile. For Uncle, tea was always the answer! He smiled with nostalgia and regret.

He went through the motions of making himself some tea, already knowing he wouldn't make it very well. He blew smoke out of his nostrils. Yet _another_ thing to annoy him!

When he turned to put the pot on the table however, Katara stood in the doorway. She was only wearing a loose shift, and her hair was in disarray, as if she had been tossing and turning in bed. She leaned on her side, arms crossed below her breasts and fixing him with very clear blue eyes.

They looked at one another for a long time - or was it just a second?

"What about now Zuko? Do you want to kiss me now?" she said softly, so softly he thought he had misheard as he carefully put the pot on the table.

"Always," he whispered, not breaking her gaze while his heart hammered far too fast. He realised she visibly relaxed and uncrossed her arms.

He knew she was going to do it before she did. Suddenly she was in his arms, her arms around his neck, lips pressed against his urgently.

Too soon they broke apart, panting. Their foreheads were still pressed together as she giggled softly. By the time they sat down, the tea was stone cold and Zuko had to reheat it, puzzled as to why it would go to cold so quickly.

"You thought I'd forget," she said finally. He looked away guiltily.

"Look Katara I'm really sorry, we were really drunk and…" and what? What could he say? He just wanted to enjoy it while it lasted? Wanted to savour the moment?

"I remember that I kissed you. But I don't remember everything. I don't remember anything after throwing up… I'm really embarrassed you had to see me like that…" She was sipping her tea.

"You fell asleep - I carried you back. I don't mind. You had a lot of rum."

"I think you had a lot of firewhisky."

"Clearly I can take my alcohol better."

"I don't know, I hardly had a hangover today. Got it all up last night," she replied sheepishly, smiling into her cup.

"Hmph."

There was a silence as they both drank their tea.

"Why did you kiss me just now?" he asked finally.

"Because you wanted me to and I wanted me to so I did," she replied. She sighed. "And because… I've been wanting to for a while and we might all die. If Aang can't let go of me it seems we probably will all die. And I didn't want to die never having kissed you … or told you … how much you mean to me." She was studiously not looking at him at this point.

There was a tense pause, and then Katara felt his hand on hers, and that strange lightening going through her body like the last time they were alone in the kitchen together. She looked up and met his intense eyes. They were searching for something, and having found her being genuine, he closed the gap between them, leaning forward in his chair.

Their lips met again, this time slowly working into the kiss, taking their time, savouring it. Zuko's tongue tentatively played with hers and somehow Katara was leaning out of her chair too, one hand gently wrapped in Zuko's hair.

On an whim, Zuko leant forward more in order to wrap his arms around Katara and pulled gently, asking her to come closer without breaking the kiss. She shuffled her chair until their legs were touching and then in one swift move that neither had anticipated she slipped onto his lap, straddling him. That prompted furious increase in pace - Katara bit his bottom lip while Zuko pulled her in closer, one hand on her back, the other on her bum.

Their hearts raced and their lips swelled, breaths became short. Zuko left her mouth and planted kisses along her jaw, tugging at her earlobe with his teeth. He smiled against her cheek when she gasped in pleasure, but continued kissing her, grazing her down her neck as she threw her head back to allow him better access. He felt her shudder in his arms, felt how her hips and his were pressing together, moving in waves against one another, searching for friction.

"Z-Zuko," she whispered, slowing them down. "Wait, wait! I don't… I can't… its just… so much!" She was scuttling away and standing up, leaving him sitting bewildered in the chair - his hair ruffled by her fingers, erection plainly visible through his loose trousers.

She bit her lip as her eyes fell on him, and he sat forwards, embarrassed, unsure as to what was happening. His good cheek flamed red.

"I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable Katara," he started, rubbing the back of his neck, looking away from her.

"No, no you're fine, its just… I can't explain, I'm sorry! I'm… I'm going to go to bed… good night Zuko…" the words spilled from her swollen lips in a rush and she turned on her heal, practically running from the kitchen.

Zuko was left stunned. What had just happened? One moment he was kissing her and the next she had run away? What had he done wrong?

He cursed himself repeatedly while he waited for his heartbeat to settle and busied himself clearing away the tea things. He practiced breathing deeply to let go of some frustration and decided to ask her about it tomorrow. He was allowed to do that right? But at the same time he didn't want her to think he was pushing for anything…. She kissed _him_ though - twice!

He threw his hands up in frustration as he climbed the dark stair to his room, quietly padding down the corridor and letting himself in. With a flick of his wrist the candles lit and Zuko froze.

Sitting on his bed was Katara, looking at him with large blue eyes.

"I'm sorry," she said quietly. "I didn't mean to do that. I got… scared," she admitted.

Zuko raised his good eyebrow. He knew her pride was almost as big as his - and to admit she was scared took some courage. Especially to him. He swallowed and sat down on the bed next to her, careful to not touch her.

"What scared you?" he asked.

"This!" she replied, indicating the two of them. "I don't know what this is Zuko and I don't know when it started and I've never felt like this before and it scares me! I don't know what I'm doing when I'm with you and I want to be around you all the time - but at the same time I feel almost sick when I am around you. And I feel so guilty because of Aang and because of the way I treated you before and because we're in the middle of a war so I shouldn't be thinking all of these things and —" Zuko cut her off by grabbing her wrists to stop her flailing arms and pressing a soft kiss to her lips. She calmed down a little and sunk into it. Slowly Zuko let go of her wrists.

"I understand things are complicated," he started, pensively. "But… I really…like you Katara. More than… more than anybody else. So if you'd like to continue … this… whatever this is… even if you don't want to tell the others, that's … well… I'd like that." Her wide eyes met his and she nodded slowly.

"I'd like that," she said quietly.

"And we don't need to do anything you don't want to," he added, thinking of how she had just run away.

"Or anything you don't want to do either," she replied.

"I don't think there's much on that list," he said, eyes skimming her body, making her blush. "I'm glad to just be near you."

She blushed at both his words and his attention.

"I'm happy to be near you too, Zuko. And I really am sorry for how awful I was to you."

"Katara, its fine. I'm sorry for everything too. I probably deserved a lot worse for chasing you all around the world and for … for Ba Sing Se. I wish I could let you and Aang and Uncle know how truly sorry I am for that. But in a way I needed to go back. I hadn't been home since I was thirteen. I needed to go back to understand that wasn't my home anymore." He spoke sadly, sincerely, absently rubbing the scarred side of his face.

Katara's eyes flicked to his hand as he spoke.

"Zuko? How did you get your scar?" she asked quietly. She watched his expression sharpen, watched him retreat behind old walls he had built around himself. She held her breath as she reached out and gently caressed the scarred tissue as she had in the cave under Ba Sing Se and something softened in his expression.

"I don't want to talk about it," he said in a strained voice.

"If you do, I'm here Zuko," she whispered, brushing his hair back with her fingers. He just nodded and bowed his head so she could reach more of his hair.

"Zuko? Is it alright if I sleep here with you tonight?" she asked after a pause. "I mean in the same bed not… you know…" she added quickly, ducking her head to hide a blush.

Zuko took a long time to answer. Her hand fell from his hair into her lap and she was bracing herself for rejection, to return to her room alone. She desperately did not want to be alone right now though.

"Yeah, you can stay," came his answer finally, as he tentatively took one of her hands.

* * *

They lay side by side, holding one hand for a long time although neither fell asleep. Eventually Katara huffed in frustration and turned to face him on her side. She nuzzled into his neck and draped herself on him, both shuffling until they were comfortable. Finally sleep took them and they fell asleep for the first time in one another's arms.


	4. Caught Red Handed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zuko and Katara get caught messing around by various people before they finally get some time alone. When they do though.... #smutcentral

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Smutty smutty smut smut. I apologise. God. I really can't write smut, not sure why I keep trying! Anyway enjoy the cringe everybody! Couldn't have a teen trope silly fic without a good dose of smut could I?

**Chapter 4: Caught Red Handed**

 

Zuko woke up just before dawn, as usual, but for once he didn’t want to jump out of bed. He was perhaps a little too warm in the tropical climate with a girl draped over him… but he didn’t really care. The smell of her hair mingled with light sweat was intoxicating, drawing him even closer to her. He wasn’t used to so much contact and it made him both a little uneasy and utterly thrilled.

Eventually he sighed and gently shook Katara awake.

“I have to go meditate,” he said in a low voice as her bleary eyes fluttered open. They focussed on him quickly, taking in where she was.

“Oh. Yeah. Of course… I’ll… I’ll let you get ready… and see you at breakfast?” she blabbered as she pushed herself off the bed awkwardly. Zuko also sat up, swallowing his disappointment at losing her weight from on top of him.

“I’ll be there! I’m sorry… about the sweat… I’m just hot. I MEAN WARM! Because I’m a fire bender. Ah…” Zuko slapped his hand against his forehead and groan, covering a blush. _Smooth, Zuko_ he thought to himself.

Katara was giggling softly and he felt a hand closing over his, gently pulling it away from his face.

“I slept well Zuko,” she reassured him, still holding his hand.

“Yeah? You can sleep with me whenever you like. I mean sleep here. In the same bed… but also the other thing… oh Agni why don’t I just shut up?” Why was he so awkward this morning? What was going on? It was as if his brain had been completely fried.

Katara just giggled again and bent down to press a kiss to his lips before walking out, humming softly to herself.

However, as she shut the door quietly behind her, somebody else was coming out from a different room down the corridor. Both doors clicked shut at the same time and the two turned quickly to look at who else was around.

Suki.

Coming out of Sokka’s room.

Her eyes took in the sleepy Katara, her hair messy and in her night gown. They then flashed to the door Katara had just closed, registering it was Zuko’s. Suki’s eyes widened and her jaw dropped slowly.

Katara’s face went bright red and she quickly brought a finger up to her lips, pleading with Suki to keep quiet.

Suki ran over to Katara on her tip toes, grabbed her wrist and pulled her into another room. Suki’s bed was still made, curtains open to let in the morning light. She shut the door behind her and let out a low squeal.

“You and Zuko?!” she said in hushed excitement.

“I didn’t sleep with him!” said Katara quickly, looking mortified as she sat gingerly on the edge of the bed. “I was just… um… sleeping in his bed…”. Katara swallowed as she realised that it sounded like a pathetically crafted excuse. “Honestly!”

Suki studied her critically and decided Katara was telling the truth.

“But there _is_ something going on with you two isn’t there? He sat next to you in the theatre and then you got back super late after that… oh gosh I can’t believe I didn’t see it happening!” Suki clapped her hands, a huge grin pasted on her face.

“Yeah… I guess there is. I’m not sure how it happened but…”

“But it just feels right?” supplied Suki.

“Yes, it does!”

“Just make sure you don’t do anything you’re not comfortable with. Honestly, don’t let him push you into anything, alright?”

“No, he’s not like that,” answered Katara, wringing her hands nervously. Suki frowned and crossed over to sit next to her on the bed, holding her hands.

“Katara, what is it?”

“Well. Argh! I _do_ want to do things! But I don’t know if its too quick or … or if I should… if I’ll regret it later… last night we were in the kitchen kissing and I just got the urge to … to… I don’t know, go further? But I got scared, it was too much and I don’t know if it’s the right time - with Aang and everything too… and there is just so much in my mind right now!” Cried a frustrated Katara, her fingers reflexively straining to bend her element.

“Katara… This might be difficult to hear… but a warrior knows each fight might be her last. And this fight we’re about to go into, I’m sure you know, is a difficult one. If we… don’t make it, what would you regret?” said Suki softly, smoothing Katara’s hands.

Katara took a deep breath.

“I would regret not doing anything.”

Suki nodded, smiling and giving Katara’s hands a squeeze.

“Then take charge of what you want, and be careful.”

“Thanks Suki. Oh please don’t tell Sokka!”

“My lips are sealed,” Suki laughed.

“Then… could you just… maybe talk me through some things?” asked Katara shyly.

“What would you like to know?”

After a long chat about technicalities, Suki watched Katara go. She sighed contentedly. It was about time Katara did something for herself, and she was glad it was now, before the battle. She liked Zuko, despite everything, and knew that he would respect whatever Katara wanted to do. Whether or not she and Sokka ended up permanently together, she would always see Katara as a little sister. And big sisters have to look out for their little sisters, didn’t they?

 

* * *

 

Zuko guided Aang through intense mediation. The boy seemed more subdued but not in the same hopeless state he had been the day before. Zuko lead them through various of the simple fire exercises he had been taught as a child and to his surprise Aang managed to sit through them patiently, really taking in the breathing and control in a way he didn’t have the concentration for before.

“Hey Zuko?” said Aang when they finally stood up and stretched. “I just wanted to say thank you for last night. I think you’re right. I think I’ve been avoiding what happened to the air peoples and I’ve been using Katara to bring peace to myself. And I’m going to try to see Katara as she is, even though I still love her.”

Zuko nodded, his throat tight as he watched a sleepy Katara in his arms with his minds eye. What would Aang do if he knew?

“She may be a little… different… to how you’ve seen her,” tried Zuko diplomatically. “As long as she’s not keeping you from achieving your destiny Aang. She wouldn’t want that.”

They went inside to get breakfast but it wasn’t ready yet so Aang decided to start playing a game with Momo. Zuko went into the kitchen to help Katara, and his heart lifted as she smiled at him.

“How did it go?” she asked quietly.

“I think there is progress,” he replied, busying himself with loading trays of steaming tea and porridge.

“That’s good,” she replied, watching him. “Do I get a kiss at any point?” asked Katara after a beat. Zuko could hear the nervousness in her voice and see the rigidity in her ‘casual’ stance. He set the bowl he was holding down and crossed over to her, taking her hands in his.

“Always, Katara,” he whispered, and leaned in to kiss her.

Again a little shock went through both of them - what had meant to be a little kiss was deepened by her hands in his hair and his around her waist. Zuko pressed her against the counter, she responded by pressing back against him, rolling her hips with his. Zuko’s fingers tightened into her hips and she moaned quietly into their kiss - Zuko greedily drank it in, any sound she made drove him a little bit crazy. They were pressed together like that when they heard footsteps outside the kitchen door.

Zuko leaped away and quickly picked up a bowl, turning away from the door to try to hide what was growing in his trousers, busying himself with reloading a tray - Katara smoothed her hair and haphazardly picked up a knife that was lying on the side.

Toph stomped in.

“Come on! We’re hungry!” she cried, in her classic morning moodiness. She stopped dead though when she felt rather unfamiliar vibrations coming from her two friends. “No. Way.” She said quietly.

“We’ll be right out,” tried Katara, nonchalantly.

“Were you two just - I know what those vibrations mean! Oh boy! This is too good!” cried Toph with glee.

“Toph please don’t tell Aang or Sokka?” tried Katara urgently, keeping her voice low. Zuko looked mortified and completely at a loss as to what to say. His first instinct was to threaten Toph but he already knew that wouldn’t work with the little Earth Bender.

“You know, a girl gets hungry around here sometimes…”

“Double portions. Whenever you want,” said Katara, exchanging a look with Zuko.

“Then my lips are sealed! Anyway knew it was gonna happen… Suki owes me some money…” she all but cackled as she sauntered out of the kitchen.

“Dear Agni,” muttered Zuko, picking up the loaded tray and feeling a prickle of sweat forming on his hairline.

“She won’t say anything… right?” asked Katara, following him out with another tray.

“No. But she’ll milk it for all its worth,” replied Zuko, slightly amused at the situation despite himself.

 

* * *

 

After breakfast they had decided that Aang would mediate on water with Katara. If he was going to try to reach the avatar state he would need a solid connection with all the elements today.

The walk down to the beach was mostly silent.

“Katara? I’m sorry. I was wrong to … to kiss you like that. Please forgive me?” said Aang in a small voice, like a child. Well, thought Katara, he _was_ a child.

“Its… Its alright Aang. I want you to know that I do love you… just not… not in that way. And I’m sorry too…” answered Katara, biting her lip. She was apologising for the Zuko situation even though Aang didn’t know it yet. Maybe she should tell him? Would it help him or would it crush him? Would he be more upset if he found out last? Would he need to find out at all?? They could be all dead soon. Katara swallowed the lump in her throat.

“You don’t need to be sorry Katara! I should have listened to Guru Pathik I think… but I’m sure we will get this working!”

“You will Aang, we all believe in you and you have so much to give! I just know you can do it!” cried Katara, pulling him into a bear hug.

“Thanks Katara.”

They stood in the waves and practiced gentle pushing and pulling to sink into a meditative state. Pushing away the past but pulling a better future towards them. Aang was in silent tears by the end of their session, having really internalised the mentor of the pushing and pulling this time. He decided he wanted to air bend alone today, connect with the monks’ wisdom. Katara went back to help make lunch. She was a little disappointed Zuko was sparring with Suki (having already sparred with Sokka) - so Katara was left ordering her brother around the kitchen to get lunch ready.

 

* * *

 

After lunch Toph took Aang to train by the hill behind the house. Zuko exchanged a long glance with Katara before going into the study that used to be his uncle’s, hoping to find something that would help the Avatar with his spiritual journey. He was sitting on the side of the desk, two scrolls in his hands, trying to see if they contained anything mildly interesting when the door to the study quietly slid open and closed again. He was still shirtless, and kept having to brush his longer hair out of his eyes as he bent over the scrolls.

Zuko looked up at the sound of the door.

Katara was leaning against the frame, watching him.

“Hello,” he said quietly, unsure now of what to do. He crossed to the cabinet and replaced the scrolls.

“Hello,” she replied, coming closer. “I enjoyed earlier,” she tried as she softly traced patterns on his arm. She was focusing on them but looked up into his eyes as he replied.

“So did I.”

Cupping her face with one hand, he leaned forward and pressed his lips against hers once again. She responded immediately, deepening the kiss. There was no hesitation on either side, and the kiss became passionate, desperate, trying to make up for where they were interrupted earlier. They were pressed against one another until there was hardly room to breathe. Zuko spun them, pushing her against the desk and she hopped on, spreading her legs so he could be close to her once more. She locked them around his hips, strong thighs pulling him as close as she could get him, bodies flush against one another.

He found the corner of her mouth, the soft skin just below her ear, gently tugged on her earlobe with his teeth. She let out a breathy moan at the sensation and dug her fingers into the back of his head, pulling his hair slightly.

“Katara,” he breathed against her neck, savouring her scent, the taste of her name on his lips. She pulled him back to her lips and kissed him hard as he rolled his hips against her. He let one hand wonder up her leggings and under her camize, running up the split at the side of her leg and then roaming to her inner thigh. He loved how her breath became more rugged as he did so, how she widened her legs for him to continue —

Suddenly there was a giggle outside the door and it slid open.

There was a sharp intake of breath.

“Oops, sorry!” came Suki’s voice as she took in the two of them, sounding genuinely mortified.

“WHAT —“ came Sokka’s, before it was cut off by the firm click of the door closing, curses becoming softer as he was bodily dragged down the corridor.

Katara laughed lightly, twisting a hand in his hair and pulling him back down to her. Zuko obeyed, leaving the annoyance at the interruption to one side and not engaging in the slight feeling of dread about having to confront Sokka at some point. He was surprised Katara wasn’t more distracted by the interruption, but she clearly had faith in Suki’s control and touched his hand lightly with hers to indicate for him to continue.

Zuko couldn’t help grinning slightly as his hand found its way between the two of them. He started massaging through her leggings, giving her the friction she wanted, savouring each hot exhale of breath as she became more and more excited. He mentally cursed the fact that today was wash day and she had to wear her old travelling outfit rather than her fire nation clothes - those would have been much easier to get off.

“Why don’t we go to my room?” he asked huskily, trying to cover the shyness in his voice.

“I’d like that,” she replied, making to push him away. Instead he grasped her under her thighs, then her bum, holding her to him as he moved away. She giggled.

“Zuko, you can’t carry me like this all the way up the stairs!” she protested, but made no move to unwrap herself from him.

Zuko just rolled his eyes as he nudged the door open with his foot. As if he hadn’t been training every day for years, fighting the whole Gaang, Earth Kingdom bullies and Fire Nation soldiers for… Agni knows how long. The slight strain of his muscles while holding Katara felt fantastic. The stairs were just opposite and he took them two at a time to prove it to her. When they crossed into his room he finally put her down, turning to lock his door. He didn’t want any more Agni-damned interruptions!

As soon as he turned back she was untying the strings around his hips, pushing his training trousers down. He shrugged them off, standing in his pants and started pealing clothes off of her too. When he reached her top bindings he tugged questioningly on where they were fixed. She just smiled and helped him unwind them.

“Oh,” he couldn’t help sigh.

“What?” she asked, her tone light, but frowning slightly.

“Those,” he said pointing accusatorially at the unwrapped bindings on the floor. “I hate those.” He moved gentle hands over to caress her breasts, this time not hidden under her night dress. He was surprised by how much larger they were without the bindings - how much older she looked when she wasn’t all wrapped up. She looked her age when she wasn’t wearing her old travelling clothes - sixteen a few months ago he had been told.

Katara was also making her observations. She had seen him topless countless times, but now she could touch what she had already committed to memory. His body was so much larger than any of the boys she had come across - she guessed because of generally a better diet and intense training - and he was almost eighteen. But she rarely got to see his defined legs since he always wore long trousers. She realised they were as strong as the rest of him and for some reason that excited her.

Katara pushed him away from her towards his bed. He gladly allowed her to as he fell backwards into the covers, watching her climb onto him and press herself against him again, this time skin on skin. He guided her torso above him slightly so he could take a nipple into his mouth and grinned at her responding shudder. He let it fall out from his lips and blew slightly, watching it pucker up for him.

Katara moved herself down his body slightly, taking his nipple into her mouth. He raised his good eyebrow, but he too felt something quite primal jolt down his body as she blew on it and it hardened. She looked at him and smiled.

“So it does work for you too,” she said, seemingly satisfied.

“Seems so,” he replied, feeling his own hard nipples and how sensitive they suddenly were.

But she was gone, her weight shifted off of him and her thumbs hooked onto the edge of his red, fire nation pants. She pulled them off quickly, watching his erection spring free with a mixture of curiosity and reserve.

“Are they all like this?” she asked uneasily. He turned to her, trying to pull her back to his lips, his other hand fiddling with her leggings. Her hand stilled his though and she shook her head slightly. He pulled back immediately.

“Um. I’m not sure… I guess so? They’re not like this when you’re not excited and I’ve never seen another man’s when he is,” replied Zuko uncertainly. That was an odd question. “What’s wrong with it?”

“No, nothing, I just thought… never mind!” she said quietly, eying it and gently placing one dark hand over the tip. It jumped by itself. She gasped. Zuko couldn’t help but feel a swell of pride at her curiosity. He didn’t actually know how they were supposed to be, never having really had friends of his age and not taking part in the crew’s more crude discussions. Mai had never said anything although he hadn’t been her first as she had been his. He swallowed any insecurities since Katara seemed only curious, not disappointed in any way. _Don’t ruin this Zuko_ , he told himself.

“Here, like this,” he said, taking her hand in his and wrapping it around his base, pulling it up and back down. She didn’t want him to touch her but she seemed to want to touch him. That was fine, he’d wait.

“I know,” she said, “I just didn’t know it… you know… moved on its own,” she giggled, trying a few pumps on her own.

“You can squeeze harder, you’re not going to hurt me,” he said after her feather soft attempts. She nodded and gripped harder, eliciting a low moan from him. She looked quite smug.

Before he knew what she was doing though she had placed herself between his legs and was timidly licking the tip. His eyes widened suddenly and his breath caught in his throat.

“Katara?” he whispered. Was this happening? Mai had never done it - there was always very little preamble until the sex. His heart started beating twice as fast.

“Just… just tell me if I do something wrong,” she said biting her lip and looking up at him, still holding him in one hand. He had lost his voice and nodded quickly, storing that picture away.

With that she lowered her mouth onto him, as far she she could go and started an up down motion, her hand covering what she couldn’t comfortably fit. Zuko couldn’t help the sounds he was making. This was beyond good. One hand curled itself in her long hair that tickled his thigh as she bobbed.

Suddenly she tried a change of tactic, sucking as hard as she could as she pulled away. He whimpered accordingly. He could almost feel her smile against him. Agni he wasn’t going to last long. As her pace increased he could feel himself close, very close. He pulled her hair gently.

“Katara… Tara I’m going to… Come away…” he gasped. She looked up at him with wide blue eyes and gently shook her head, not slowing her movement as he felt himself come into her mouth.

Katara’s eyes widened in shock and she struggled to deal with the sudden force, pulling away and coughing. Zuko was panting.

He looked down at her, coughing, with a little bit dribbling out of her mouth and some of the rest of it coming out onto his stomach.

She was quick and bent it all away from both of them, frowning.

“Sorry! I didn’t expect it to be like that… and to come out like that…” she was saying, finally leaving her coughing fit behind.

He pulled her back up to him and kissed her, rolling on top of her and leaving kisses all over her face and neck. She was giggling and he relished the sound, drinking it in even as his body still tingled in pleasure. He sat up over her for a moment, taking in her lying there with her hair spread out around her, on _his_ pillows and smiling at _him_. He felt his chest contract painfully.

“So, that was alright?” she asked, breaking the silence.

“That was… incredible. My turn?” he asked hopefully, sliding one hand down and over her breasts. She looked a little apprehensive but nodded, watching him carefully.

He gently pulled off her leggings and observed in dismay her lower wrappings. How was he meant to make sense of these?! She laughed lightly.

“They actually keep together if you pull them off carefully,” she explained, wriggling between his legs as she started pushing them down. Zuko understood and quickly took over, throwing them across the room as she was _finally_ fully naked. He caressed her newly freed thighs, noticing how they were slightly paler than the rest of her legs and her stomach. He guessed from water bending in the sun but always wearing her wrappings. They were sensitive to his touch, and he watched goosebumps form across her skin.

She was blushing a deep red under his gaze and he felt suddenly a little guilty. She wasn’t used to this - not that he was particularly - but for him just to sit there, playing with her… well that was perhaps a little intense. Instead he lay on top of her, careful to put his weight on his arm by her head and kissed her while his other hand explored.

She was already very wet, and just that got him excited again. He fumbled around with his thumb on the front of her until he heard her sharp intake of breath against his lips, allowing him to circle in just the right way. Katara had stopped kissing him back - had stilled under his caresses, completely taken with the sensations. Instead Zuko left her lips and focussed on her neck as she had liked earlier, tentatively trying one finger down below.

His body started humming with excitement as she gasped, as her nails dug into his shoulder slightly. He tried another finger, never letting up with his thumb and drank in her moan. He left her neck, peppering kisses down her body, licking and biting her nipples slightly, feeling her squirm below him. When he reached her hips he quickly swapped his thumb for his tongue, flicking her, sucking slightly. He didn’t really have much experience in this area, but he knew enough to make it up - and whatever made her call out he did more of. Katara’s hands were in his hair, her hips were following the rhythm of his fingers, of his tongue, trying to get more from him.

“Now… now Zuko…” came her voice. He paused to look up at her.

“Are you sure?”

“Yes!”

Her whole body was trembling in excitement and nervousness, but her eyes were glazed and lidded with desire. He was definitely ready although he felt like his heart was about to beat right out of his chest.

Slowly, allowing her to get used to the feel of him, he pushed himself inside. Her muscles were clamping around him but after a few seconds of being still he felt them relax a little. She smiled at him, suddenly shy, and nodded.

With that he set up a slow rhythm, savouring her lips on his, but soon it wasn’t enough. She had curled her legs around his hips and was frantically pulling him in, wanting to increase his speed - Zuko obliged all too readily. He could feel her coming close; her body trembled, her head was thrown back as he pushed harder. He took one hand between them and found her clit again, throwing her over the edge with a high moan - which he promptly followed.

Zuko stayed inside her for a little bit, their foreheads pressed together, until she had stopped moving below him and he had caught his breath. He then rolled off to one side. She sat up slightly and used her water bending to dispel all the liquid, pulling it out from inside of her too. Zuko pursed his lips in admiration. She probably didn’t even need the contraceptive tea.

She rolled over to him, kissing him lightly on the cheek and draped one leg over him as she had done the night before. Now it felt right though, without clothes, skin on skin. He could feel her heartbeat slow gradually.

“I… didn’t hurt you did I?” he asked quietly, stroking her hair.

“No. I… really enjoyed that. I didn’t know it was like that - that it would feel like that…” she said quietly, leaning up on her elbow slightly to look into his eyes. He grinned, pride welling in his chest and brushed some hair from her face. But her expression changed suddenly to worry.

“What’s the matter?” he asked, cupping her cheek. She seemed like she didn’t want to share but he was suddenly worried. Had he done something wrong? Did she regret it? “You can tell me Katara,” he said earnestly.

“Its nothing… I mean its probably silly…”

“What is?”

“I just… um… I guess I’m sorry if I wasn’t you know… as good as somebody like Mai - I don’t really have much experience and well I just hope I was alright…”

Zuko shut her up by pulling her on top of him into a kiss.

“You’re a real idiot sometimes, Waterbender,” he growled into her ear.

“So you weren’t … bored?” came her small voice from where she had buried her face into his neck.

“Times like this are when I can see you’re related to your brother. How in Agni’s name did you think I got bored?” He was getting worked up a little now.

“You just didn’t say anything and I couldn’t help crying out but you were just silent so I don’t really understand -“

“Would you prefer me to be more… vocal?” he asked in disbelief. He wasn’t a very loud person unless he was angry.

“No. Yes. No. I just want to know what’s going through your mind!” He could feel the redness of her cheeks against his neck.

“Katara… when we were doing that I wasn’t thinking straight. It was … really, really… good. I’m… very… happy. You were amazing - it was amazing. This was the best sex that I’ve ever had. So please don’t think things like that,” he said quietly, still stroking her hair. His heart seemed to have migrated to his throat and for some reason those words were hard to vocalise. He was rarely happy but in that moment he absolutely was. And he wanted her to know that, he wanted her insecurities to go away.

“And besides,” he added when he felt her relax a little, “if you had opened your eyes little more instead of arching away from me like that you would have seen just how much I was enjoying it.”

She giggled and finally emerged from her hiding place to press a kiss to his lips.

“Good,” she said, closing the conversation. She slid to his side, back to her draped-on-Zuko position and sighed contentedly.

They lay together like that for a long time, her hands gently running up and down his chest.

“I have to get dinner ready you know,” she said finally. He growled.

“Let them starve.”

“And what about you? You’ll starve too!” she laughed, swatting him playfully. Zuko rolled on top of her, bringing her into another lazy kiss.

“I’ve got enough to eat here,” he said softly, working his way down her neck and latching on to a nipple, and then working his way lower.

Katara giggled again, tangling both her hands in his hair and pulling him away.

“Stoop! Come on, help me find my clothes.” She was already wriggling out from underneath him when he finally grunted and let her leave the bed.

“I don’t like your clothes,” he grumbled, getting up and locating his own. “I should have burned them off when I had the chance.”

Katara rolled her eyes.

“ _Please_ don’t get any ideas like that! Right. I’m going to get started on dinner.”

“I’ll help,” he said, still in a dark mood at being thrown away from what at been the best moments of his recent life. He definitely wasn’t going to make dinner easy for her.


	5. Confrontations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The others find out about Zuko and Katara... and just... silliness ensues.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am sorry for the silliness.

**Chapter 5: Confrontations**

 

In the kitchen they worked diligently, but every time they brushed against one another a little shock wound its way across their bodies.

“Ow!” cried Katara suddenly, holding up a bleeding finger. She quickly bent some water and healed it, but she looked angry at herself.

“Clumsy,” he muttered, not willing to admit how his heart skipped a beat to see her in pain.

“What was that, sorry?” she asked sweetly.

“Clumsy, Katara,” he said slightly louder, focussing on what he was chopping. Katara sighed melodramatically.

“I guess since I’m so clumsy and you’re not, you’ll have to finish cutting the carrots,” she said, grinning mischievously. Zuko raised his good eyebrow and carefully put down the knife he was holding. He could play. He had rarely felt playful but somehow he felt so connected to Katara in this moment that he wanted to be a little silly.

He moved to stand behind her.

“It’s really not that difficult Katara,” he said, covering both her hands with his and lifting up the knife. He pressed himself against her back. “You just need to stay focussed.” He started slowly chopping the carrot as his lips found the back of her ear. He had to make sure to keep any eye on what they were chopping, but he heard her contented hum.

What he didn’t realise was that she could also play, and she started moving her butt in circles, pushing up against him, undulating, coaxing him to follow her movements. She could hear his breath become a little more laboured and a hardness grow against her. The carrot had been chopped but he hadn’t moved away.

Katara turned her head and her body slightly so she could reach his lips. Instinctively she took his bottom lip between her teeth and pulled gently, watching how his eyes rolled towards her.

“Come on Zuko, stay focussed,” she whispered and freed herself from his grasp, taking the chopped carrots and moving over to the pot, swaying her hips and feeling his gaze on her.

She turned to look at him once the carrots were emptied in and she saw his wide eyes narrow slightly and his mouth open to say something, just as the door to the kitchen burst open.

“Smells good sis but you’ll have to delay it for a while. I have a date with a certain jerk bender,” announced Sokka, grabbing Zuko by the front of the robe and pulling him out before either could protest.

====

 

Katara was shocked for a second, but she quickly took the pot off the fire and ran after them into the courtyard. Suki came running from the opposite direction too.

“Sorry!” she called, “I couldn’t hold him any longer!”

“Its alright Suki! Sokka, let Zuko go RIGHT NOW,” called Katara, running down the few steps into the sunken courtyard. Zuko was making no effort to get Sokka off him, but was looking rather angry. It seemed they had come crashing back to the real world rather unceremoniously from their moments of freedom. Katara’s heart was in her throat but she tasted bitterness in her mouth; _why_ wasn’t she _ever_ allowed to do something for herself? To just be by herself for a little while! She was _not_ going to take this sitting down.

“I’ll let go alright!” Sokka’s voice cut through her musings. “Where are your swords? We will settle this right now.”

“Settle what!” cried Katara, marching towards them.

“The fact that he was kissing MY LITTLE SISTER!” cried Sokka, looking very upset. Zuko held up his hands and took a step backwards, good cheek burning a bright red.

“I thought we were bros!” Sokka continued accusatorially.

“We _are_ bros,” tried Zuko, looking more and more unsure of what was going on.

“Well bros don’t get with other bros’ little sisters! Come on coward, fight me for her!”

“STOP!” screamed Katara, bending water from the rain barrels and freezing them both. She was furious! _‘Fight me for her?!’_ she thought, _Does Sokka have a death wish! Did he not know her at all!_

Sokka struggled against the ice but thankfully, Zuko had the good sense not to melt it.

“NOBODY is fighting ANYBODY! I can… uh…kiss … who I want! I’m not yours or anybody else’s to be fought for!”

“DAMN RIGHT SUGAR QUEEN!” came Toph’s voice from the side, punching a hand up into the air. She had appeared from the side of the house.

Sokka’s mouth had dropped though. He had picked up on the hesitation around the word kiss.

“Don’t tell me. Don’t tell me you’ve done more than kiss!” He looked frantically from one to the other as if his world were unravelling. Zuko’s whole face went red. Katara met Suki’s eyes, who gave her a thumbs up and a wink behind Sokka’s head.

“That is absolutely _none of your business_ Sokka,” she said, putting both hands on her hips. Toph was sniggering.

“You’re my little sister! I have to protect you! And now this jerk bender has found a way into your bed… no no no Katara you can’t sleep with him! I won’t allow it!” Sokka sounded panicked.

Katara’s blood drained from her face though as she saw Aang emerging into the courtyard too, grey eyes wide and flicking between her and Zuko, a confused frown on his face. She bit her lip.

“Sokka!” came an angry voice from his other side. Suki. _Thank La for Suki,_ thought Katara - and she was looking appropriately thunderous. Sokka visibly swallowed and shrank back in his icy prison. “Katara is a woman who can make up her own mind what she does and with who -how dare you tell her what she can and can’t do! If you’re trying to restrict her maybe you should fight _her_! And then try me for good measure. I thought we’d taught you that back on Kyoshi. I’m disappointed Sokka.” Suki crossed her arms and looked away, cutting Sokka’s tirade right down.

Toph whistled.

“You’ve lost this one Snoozles, sorry. Sugar queen can go around sleeping with who she wants. Can we get some food now?”

“Wait, Suki, I’m sorry! I know I know, but she’s my little sister you know? And he’s supposed to be a bro!” he turned his head back to face Zuko. “How would you like it if I tried to sleep with your sister?”

“On second thoughts, this just got better,” commented Toph, taking a seat on one of the steps.

There was a tense silence before everybody burst out laughing.

“Alright alright, maybe trying to sleep with your sister is a bad example…”

“Sokka, can you imagine, even just for a second, me trying to tell my sister what to do? And anyway as a _bro_ I would warn you that you do _not_ want to get involved with that!”

Sokka chuckled. Katara tentatively released them from the ice, making sure they were both dry but keeping the water to her command.

“Alright but _my_ sister is not a psychopath… usually…” Katara narrowed her eyes at him, shifting her fingers to show him the water at his feet was still under her control. He yelped and stepped away from it. “What I’m trying to say is I don’t like this and you better not hurt her!” he crossed the gap to Zuko and jabbed him in the chest with his finger. Then his eyes widened. “Unless it was a one-time thing! It better have not been a one time thing taking advantage of my sister you little ——“

“Sokka….” Came Suki’s warning voice. Sokka looked at her, took a deep breath and closed his eyes.

“Even if it was a one-time thing I understand that if you are both consenting to it then that is your business,” he recited, but when he opened his eyes he narrowed them again. “Doesn’t mean I have to like it! Watch your back jerk bender. If I catch so much of a whiff of you doing something she doesn’t want to do, I’ll make sure its the last thing you do!”

“Pfft, come on Snoozles, this is Sparky we’re talking about! Apart from the fact Sugar Queen could _totally_ blood bend him senseless whenever she wants, he’s not the type to do anything _dishonourable_ ,” called Toph, who was now picking at her feet.

Her words seemed to calm Sokka down considerably and he straightened, all aggression gone from his posture.

“Oh yeah! Well, had to be said,” he said, smiling sheepishly at Zuko and shrugging. “Come on bro, lets get some food, I’ll get over it eventually,” he said clapping an arm around Zuko’s shoulders and heading towards the kitchen. Zuko shot Katara a bewildered look.

“Um, thanks?” he said, uncertainly.

“Yeah well, we’re bros right? I just want you to know you’ve really pushed it today so you’ll have to be extra nice to her, ok?” he was saying as they disappeared inside.

Toph jumped up and sauntered over to Katara, giving her a punch on the arm that was likely to bruise.

“Nice one Sweetness. Was wondering when you’d lose the V. Gimme a few years I’ll catch up to you two. That kind of control over men must be intoxicating! Fan girl, you’ve got it perfected with Snoozles!”

Suki was joining them and blushed.

“I didn’t do anything, I just explained to him that he couldn’t try to control….”

“Save it Fan, its good that you’re saying all the right things, but we all know you could make him do whatever you want. Come to think of it, Sparky already does whatever you want Sugar Queen… you sure you’ve just started sleeping with him now?”

“Toph! Zuko does what I want because …”

“Oh please, its cause he’s thinking with his dick, just like Snoozles. Honestly. Try it, go buy something revealing and watch them grovel at your feet…”

Katara and Suki exchanged a look.

“That’s not actually a bad idea…could be fun…” started Suki.

“And we do need some new fire nation clothes, our old ones are falling apart…” added Katara. Toph laughed.

“Oh boy this is going to be good! Just make sure I’m far enough away so I can’t hear you when you do the do!”

“If.” Said Suki, smirking.

“Oh Fan Girl, leaving them hanging? That’s evil. I love it. You know I’ve never given you enough credit really… right, where’s Twinkletoes? Oh right already inside eating. Lets go before the three boys eat all the food!”

“Want to go shopping tomorrow morning?” asked Katara.

“It would be my pleasure!” replied Suki, giggling.

——

The food was finished and they were all sitting in silence. Sokka patted his belly contentedly. Zuko and Katara were studiously ignoring one another, just waiting for Aang’s reaction.

“Guys, I wanted to ask you something,” started Aang.

“What is it Aang?” said Katara kindly, starting to collect some plates. She was subconsciously holding her breath

“Well I don’t really understand why you were so mad at Zuko,” he said to Sokka. “I mean we all slept together all of the time when we were travelling… I don’t get why Zuko sleeping with Katara is such a big deal?”

There was complete silence while it clicked in everybody’s minds that Aang must have not heard about the kissing.

“Oh, boy,” said Toph quietly. Laughter was on everybody’s tongue but Aang was being so genuine and confused they all bit it down.

“Um… how did the monks tell you babies were made sweetie?” tried Suki, shooting Sokka a pleading look.

“Oh! They said the girl monks and the boy monks, or girl and boy nomads would sometimes meet and play some special games to make the baby,” he said.

“Right… well… what we mean when we say sleeping together is not sleeping next to each other… its playing those games…”

Aang frowned.

“You’re making a baby with Zuko?”

“NO!” shouted everybody. Zuko looked just as panicked as Sokka.

“Um no Aang, its just that those games don’t need to end in a baby you know? When two people like one another very much they will sometimes just play those games for fun… because they feel good…without the baby at the end,” Suki looked satisfied with that explanation.

“Oh! Well I also… like… Katara, so can I play the game?” he asked, turning his wide eyes to Katara.

Katara choked on the water she was drinking, Toph having to hit her on the back to get it back up.

“Right, Snoozles, since you found him first you’re going to have to take him out and explain it properly,” demanded Toph.

“Toph I can’t do that!”

“Yeah well ‘playing a game’ didn’t quite cut it did it? Come on just explain to the kid how it all works, then we can stop with these misunderstandings - I don’t think Sugar Queen can take much more embarrassment,” she said.

“Hey! I’m right here! And we’re the same age!” cried Aang, getting agitated at whatever he wasn’t understanding.

“Yeah but unlike you, I spent my time kicking ass at the Earth Rumble with my ears open and a hell of a lot of people telling me what’s what. Look, you were at the temple, you missed out on the whole dad-son talk. So Snoozles is going to step in here and be the mature one, _isn’t he_ ,” finished Toph. She was getting second hand embarrassment on behalf of Katara and Zuko - and it had stopped being fun.

Sokka hung his head.

“Alright. But Zuko has to come with me too. Manly chat. Aang, Zuko, lets go!” He stood up to leave.

“Sokka, I’m sure you can do this—“

“You owe me, jerk bender, this is your fault —“

“How is this my fault! If you hadn’t paraded my personal life around in front of everybody —“

“Just help me out!”

“Fine!”

“Come on Aang!” they said in unison, leading the way to the other room.

 

* * *

 

After the guys left Katara groaned and buried her head in her hands.

“This was _not_ meant to happen,” came her muffled voice from behind her fingers.

“Yeah well it wasn’t my fault so I still deserve my double portions,” said Toph, helping herself to some more food from the pot.

“I’m really sorry Katara,” offered Suki, biting her lip.

“Not your fault Suki, we should have been more careful. Argh, I’m going to KILL Sokka! And Aang… oh La, Aang!” Katara’s eyes kept flicking to the door to where the boys had gone.

“You know,” said Toph between mouthfuls, “there is a place in the corridor upstairs where you can hear what’s going on in the living room.”

Suki and Katara exchanged looks.

“Alright you continue getting double portions - show us where!” said Katara quickly, pulling Toph up from her seat. Toph smirked.

“Anything you say Sugar Queen!”

They tiptoed upstairs as quickly as they could, until Toph stopped and touched her ear, indicating they listen. Suki lowered herself to the ground where the sound was louder. She indicated Katara to look at something on the floor when she found the two little spy holes. They tuned into the boys’ talk in the room below.

“… So when you get those times happening to you,” Sokka was saying, motioning to his trousers, “well it can mean that you find somebody physically attracted or you … uh … like them very much.”

“But it only happens randomly to me, or when I sleep sometimes,” Aang said, “I don’t think it happens when I look at somebody!”

“Not yet,” came Zuko’s curt reply.

“Yeah, Zuko’s right! At some point it will happen when you like somebody _in that way_. And then… uh… well… a girl doesn’t have one like we do… they have sort of a… hole… and it feels nice. Zuko? Take over?” Sokka’s whole face had gone red. Zuko groaned.

“When you get excited because of this special person, and she also gets excited because of you, you can … uh … stick it inside of her. And… you have a special time with that person…” Zuko looked at Aang expectantly.

Aang’s brows were furrowed. Zuko sighed.

“Why don’t you - I don’t know - draw him a diagram or something,” Zuko snapped at Sokka, crossing his arms and looking away angrily.

“Yes! That’s a great idea,” cried Sokka genuinely, picking up a brush and a piece of parchment from the table. Zuko groaned. “Aang, ask what you want while I draw you some diagrams!”

“I’ve just… never seen that happen!”

“Oh Agni. No Aang, its something private between a man and a woman. Or a man and a man. Or a woman and a woman. But we can leave those for now.” Aang looked even more confused at Zuko’s answer.

Sokka, meanwhile, was drawing on some parchment on the coffee table, directly below where Suki and Katara were looking down on the scene. They both had to stifle their laughter. Zuko had angrily stalked over to look too and they heard him choke slightly and his shoulders vibrate from laughter, but he made a galant effort to not mock Sokka.

“Right Aang,” started Sokka, calling him over.

“What’s that?” asked Aang, pointing at the thing that was supposed to be a penis.

“What! Can’t you tell! That’s your… you know… penis…” explained Sokka, almost whispering the last word. Katara rolled her eyes as Toph stifled her giggles and Suki sighed, exasperated.

“And this,” he continued, “is the lady version. It’s whats there instead of a penis. See how it goes inwards?” He indicated a very poorly drawn hole going inside the outline of a woman from the side. There were no details and definitely not anatomically correct. Katara could only imagine the type of punishment Yugoda would dish out for such a botched diagram.

“So we put this,” he pointed at the penis, “inside of here. Like this see?” He flourished his last diagram that they thought was meant to be a man on top of a woman.

There was a silence as Aang took in the drawing, trying to understand where one person ended and the other began. The top of his head had gone red in a blush.

“That’s disgusting!” he pronounced finally. “Why would you do that!!!”

“Because it feels good and if you… like the person you are doing it with, it gives both of you a special time, just the two of you,” tried Zuko, looking visibly worried. “Its… its what comes after kissing…” he added.

Various emotions flashed over Aang’s face but still with this undertone of disgust.

“Does that mean you love Katara?” he whispered, looking Zuko straight in the eyes.

“I… uh… I really like Katara… I love her like we all do but a bit more…” His face had turned a colour to match Aang’s and he was rubbing the back of his neck, looking away. Sokka seemed worried.

“There are different kinds of love, Aang. We love friends and we love family but to be _in love_ … that’s… sometimes you’re not sure if you are… I thought I was _in love_ with Yue, but after spending time with Suki I know that’s not true… because I … feel more for Suki than I did with Yue. _Now_ I think I’m probably in love with Suki but I didn’t know that immediately,”

“I feel the same about Mai and Katara,” said Zuko quietly, “I thought I loved Mai, but I felt nothing for her compared to how I feel about Katara.”

Upstairs, Toph pretended to retch while the other girls tried to keep a small tear from falling. They silently continued watching.

“But…” started Aang, “I love Katara… but I don’t want to do that! When two people l-really like each other, do they always want to do this?”

“Um. I think you’re a little young to want to do this, Aang,” said Sokka gently. “Maybe one day you will want to, but you sort of grow into it… into liking people _in that way_. So when we say she doesn’t like you _in that way_ , its partly because she doesn’t want to do this either.”

“But you like her,” said Aang quietly, turning to Zuko again, “and she likes you. And you both want to do this… _sleeping together_ thing?”

“Uh. Yeah.”

“Then I think you don’t like her like I do. I think the way we… like… her are different?” said Aang finally. Zuko looked relieved. “I… I didn’t realise that’s what people _did_!”

“Well… not at your age anyway,” butted in Sokka, “but I’m glad we now all understand what’s going on here, right? Helpful diagrams are the best!” He clapped both on the shoulders and grinned. Zuko groaned and slapped his hand on his forehead.


End file.
